tears and ideals

I've had a really crappy day today so I've posted a picture from our recent trip to cornwall to cheer me up!
An old friend from home has just very unexpectedly died and I have spent the afternoon trying to work out what music I should play for his funeral. Another friend whose dad died in the last 12 months of cancer contacted me to tell me about his mum who just had a massive brain operation to remove a possible cancerous tumor, and someone else has gotten pregnant and isn't sure whether she can go through with it or not. The circle of life. I know we value life so highly precisely because it ends but the end is so difficult for the people left behind. There are no words...

It's hard trying to be a good person. I want to be responsible in every part of my life - but sometimes circumstances just don't allow me to behave as I would like. Take for example the amount of travel I do...As a freelance musician I work with whichever orchestra books me - wherever they may be and that sometimes means driving 250 miles...one way. So how can I unify the amount of pollution I am creating with my constant attempts to be more green? Simply put, I can't. But what else can I do? I can only work where they need flautists and I always work locally when I can but it's just not that simple often - with tours and the like. Yet I have to work to live and it's a job I love. I am constantly envious of my canadian friend who seems to have created a beautifully simple, green life for herself yet I know I would not be happy if I were in a similar situation. I guess we can only strive for perfection and do as much as we can to do as little harm.

We had a beautiful day yesterday. It was the village easter egg hunt and all the folk gathered on the village green for age old games and egg and spoon races...It was a wonderful community event involving everyone. I feel very lucky to be living where we do - I think a lot of the sickness in our society is due to the breakdown of communities and I do everything I can to be involved in the hope that my daughter will be able to grow up in a place where everyone takes care of everyone else.