comments

thanks for taking me seriously! I really appreciate your comments and am pleased you thought the pictures were so positive - I thought they were pretty positive but you've made me feel even stronger!
here's what i wrote at the time of doing the pictures and reflecting on them;

being pregnant-
my body is large to express both the good and bad sides of being this pregnant...I am uncomfortable and get annoyed by just how big my belly is (I underestimate it often and keep banging into things!) but at the same time I feel absolutely important - everyone else/thing is rushing around doing their jobs and taking part in expectations of society but I am not at all interested and feel work/money/how I'm seen etc is totally unimportant and have a kind of still inner peace which allows me to seperate myself from all that...I am at peace with nature - at one with it which is why my body outline is green like the trees I am surrounded by (the people in contrast are small, ill-defined and grey). The female parts - breasts/womb/vagina are bright pink to show that their time is here and that my body is absolutely naturally made for birthing/nurturing. No head because it is not important - I do not need to think to birth...my body knows how to do it alone and in fact thought may just become inhibitions...the body must take over from the mind. The yellow in and around the womb is positive warmth and pleasure at carrying a child - who is blue and white as it is so peaceful and pure. The figure is centralized to indicate balance and focus....
I hadn't realised I'd omitted arms and feet but I think this is just because I don't see them as being of use particularly in gestating a baby I guess...

fantasy of labour/birth-
I see birth as a purely physical event which I would like to approach in an entirely natural and uninterrupted way. The roof and walls around me represent my strong need for privacy to feel safe, secure and aboe to fully respond to my body's primordeal urges. The walls are black as I feel I need protection from negative outside sources (obstetrics etc). I am naked as there is nowhere to hide in birthing - even from yourself - you can only be what you are as a reproductive animal. Squatting seems natural and a recognition of the need to behave instinctively and without inhibition..it also looks like a strong and balanced position. The black spot is a focus on the central core of being a woman and the turning inwards I feel will be necessary to deal with the pain. It is black because it is not to be taken lightly or underestimated. Inner strength. The red spiral indicates how I see contractions and the way their pain is. They result in the birth of the pure newborn though so they are good and the way the pain seems to encase the baby suggests to me that I feel the pain is a protective device that enures the baby and me work together to complete the birth in the best way possible. The pain is big but manageable. The yellow around us is the joy of the occasion. The cloud for a head indicates the need to act physicaliy rather than responding to 'knowledge' or cultural desires. And that I hope to be ultimately at peace despite what is happening...